Why Counselling?

Talking with a counsellor has many advantages, not least the fact that they are not a family member or a friend. These people may not always be best placed to help you. As counsellors, we are trained to listen in a particular way and to share what we hear in such a manner as to help you understand yourself better. If you feel that you want to resolve some particular issue then Contact Me to make an initial appointment at my office in Aylesbury, Buckinghamshire.

Areas of Counselling

I can help with counselling in a wide variety of areas: Abuse (Emotional, Mental, Physical, Sexual),  Addictions (Alcohol, Drugs, Exercise, Gambling, Shopping, Smoking, Sex, Work), Anger management, Bereavement and loss, Depression, Eating Disorders (Anorexia, Binge Eating Disorder, Bulimia and Compulsive Overeating), Low self esteem and confidence, Relationships (Couple’s counselling, divorce counselling, issues around sex/intimacy, infidelity), Stress (Money, health, relationships, work), Trauma (Experiencing/witnessing accidents, attacks, abuse, violence, wars, natural disasters etc), Post-traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD).

101 Questions about Counselling (well… 16)

  • What is counselling?
    Counselling is a space where you can talk to somebody about your problems.
  • I have friends and family for that. Why come and see you?
    We do have friends and family but sometimes they are part of the problem.
  • But they know me better than you do. You’re a stranger.
    True, but being a stranger means I meet you with no preconceptions. It also means that whatever you talk about stays with me. You don’t see me at the breakfast table!
  • But aren’t you just going to tell me what I already know?
    I hope not. But if I tell you what you already know, that might confirm your judgement.
  • So what does a counsellor do?
    A counsellor is trained to listen in a particular way. To hear what you aren’t saying out loud.
  • A sort of super hearing special power?
    Not exactly. It’s about being able to give you my attention without all the usual distractions.
  • So you listen. What else do you do?
    I try to put together the various things you tell me in a way that makes sense of them.
  • Sounds like doing a jigsaw puzzle.
    It is. By listening and asking questions a counsellor tries to put the various pieces of your story together in a way that helps you make sense of them.
  • I can see that might be interesting.
    It is more than just interesting. The past is the key to the future. If we understand our past, we can see how it influences our present.
  • I’m not sure I understand that idea.
    Well, if you had parents who always put you down, you might always choose partners who do the same to you. You might never do as well at work as you could because you never think you’re good enough. Counselling can help you see how your past experience – very harsh parents – shapes your present, for example, by always choosing a partner who puts you down.
  • But why would I do that?
    There are several answers. But one reason might be because that’s the kind of relationship you know about and feel comfortable in.
  • I can see that might be helpful.
    So, how long does it take? There isn’t an exact answer to that question.
  • You mean you just want to carry on taking my money for as long as possible?
    You’ve been watching too much Reality TV. A doctor can say, “Take a course of antibiotics for two weeks and the infection will clear up.” Counselling isn’t an exact science. Some people find two sessions is enough. Others need two or three years.
  • You say you’re a psychodynamic counsellor, what is that?
    Psychodynamic counsellors think that we are all influenced by our unconscious. (Think of Cloud storage. But a Cloud that affects us all the time.) The work is about seeing how this Cloud operates in the session. So, are you on time for your appointments? Do you get shirty if you hear something you don’t like? Do you want to flirt with your counsellor? It all tells us something about how you work.
  • Mmmm. Final questions. How much? How long? Where? Can I park easily? What happens if I miss a session?

    Fees

    Fees are around £45 a session. The individual fee will be discussed during the initial assessment.

    Session Times

    I can offer sessions early morning, during the day or evening from Monday to Friday, or Saturday mornings.

    Parking & Transport

    There are various public car parks near to the counselling room. It is also close to Aylesbury railway and bus stations.

    All these answers are also in the FAQ section on the What to Expect page and also on the appointments page.

  • I’ll have to go away and think about this.
    Sensible idea – counselling is a serious business. But well worth the effort.